Dr. Twuth–Friends Don't Make Friends Eat Spam
Dr. Twuth–Because social media shouldn’t make you want to punch kittens.
Welcome to Tuesdays with Dr. Twuth, here to answer all your questions, problems and concerns about social media. Since social media (done properly) involves interacting with other humans, it is just a good plan to have an advice column handy to help navigate the emotional waters of keeping thousands of friends happy and speaking to us.
My alter ego, Dr. Twuth can be counted on to give you the best information on social media. And, since a spoon full of
sugar humor, makes the I’d rather be punched in the face than read about social media marketing medicine go down, fun is always a guarantee here with me, Dr. Twuth, Text Therapist. The tips offered here are all based off my #1 best-selling books We Are Not Alone–The Writer’s Guide to Social Media and Are You There, Blog? It’s Me, Writer.
If our goal is to build an author platform in the thousands to tens of thousands, then we will have to approach ALL social media differently than a faceless corporation or even the regular person who does not possess a goal of becoming a brand. This blog will help you rule social media–regardless of platform–without devolving into a spam bot. If social media makes you want to slam your head in a door, then you are in the right place. Just call on Dr. Twuth, because the Twuth will set you free.
On to our peeps in need…
Dear Dr. Twuth,
I have a Twitter problem and I know that you have the solution. I have Real Life friends and fellow writers as my Twitter followers. Recently I got an angry message from a non-writer friend who was pissed off by the amount of links to writing and book marketing advice I’m sharing. She’s just not interested in that stuff. And I suspect that many of my future readers won’t be either.
Should I tell her to just unfollow me on Twitter and chatter in Facebook? Or is there a healthy balance to be found in creating interesting content for well, lots of different kind of people? How can I please diverse followers (and myself)?
I Don’t Want To Be A Spammer
This is a really good question and a dilemma many writers face. First of all, since we cannot control others without illegal use of duct tape and a shock collar, we need to look to our own behavior first. One of the biggest problems I see with writers is that they get on social media and become the All Writing All the Time Channel.
Afraid to stray from the comfort zone, many writers tweet about writing and talk about writing and blog about writing. And, while they will connect to other writers, it can be a turn off for that group of people who will (hopefully) one day be readers. I find it a tad ironic that all the links you are posting about marketing to readers is ticking off the potential readers. Our enthusiasm for writing can be seen by outsiders as selfishness if we aren’t careful.
The best marketing for readers–aside from a darn excellent book–is likability. People buy from who they know and who they LIKE. Connect with people. Talk to people. Be a person. We need to look at why people are gravitating to social media by the millions if we hope to use this tool effectively. Serve the need. Social media has become the new village square where people can meet, talk, chat, and share. We have a very human need to connect. Connection only happens when we care about others more than ourselves. We have to listen more than we talk.
I know it might be hurtful your friend said something, but she might have done you a favor. Others could have just quietly unfollowed and faded away without explanation. Criticism can be painful and embarrassing, but it can also help us make real changes for the better.
One tactic I teach is the Law of Three. 1/3 Information, 1/3 Reciprocation and 1/3 Conversation. We need to maintain a healthy balance in our social media discourse. Part of the reason for the Reciprocation and Conversation is it proves we are listening as well as talking. I would recommend that if you want to forward on blogs, look for some that appeal to more than just writers.
The #WANA711 group just finished my Blogging for Author Brand Class and they have some of the best blogs on the web….and they have all been trained to blog about something other than writing. They have been trained to come up with content that will connect to potential READERS, so this is a wealth of material at your fingertips.
This group blogs on all kinds of topics–nostalgia, faith matters, family, health, history. I, myself, can only read so many writing blogs before it just becomes white noise. #WANA711 has been a breath of fresh air with exciting content that makes me think, cry or even laugh out loud.
In the end, I believe that if you are proactive and seek balance in your conversation everything will work out fine. Yet, do not feel that you are required to hang on to toxic friends, either. If you work hard to balance your posts and this friend still pitches a fit, then it is time to just let her move on. It is painful, but our close support network is vital, so it needs to be comprised of people who like us for who we are and are willing to support our goals and dreams….and buy beer.
All the best,
See how easy this is? Do you have a social media dilemma? Is someone making you crazy? Do you feel alone, afraid or unsexy? Leave your question in the comments or if you would like to maintain anonymity, e-mail Dr. Twuth at kristen at kristen lamb dot org. Just put GIVE ME THE TWUTH in the subject line.
I am about love and offering a human touch to this digital world. My Dr. Twuth identity is #MyWANA certified, or certifiable, I can’t recall which. But, hey, it’s free so if you don’t like my advice, I promise to give you 100% refund (There will be a $15.99 processing fee for said refund).
Let me, Dr. Twuth, help you out. Remember, the Twuth will set you free.
Tweet ya later!